Won It By Minus-Three-Million   (2017Jan04)


Wednesday, January 04, 2017                                          1:47 PM

Although President-elect Fuckface von Clownstick has won the election by negative-three-million votes, I continue to cherish these last days of Obama’s term. While the disgraceful pervert has yet to be inaugurated, America is still being led by a great man—a man everyone respects—and we can still take pride in our nation.

I know a lot of people want to go along and get along—but the chain is broken. ‘Coming together’ over the victor of any election always seemed inevitable before—but when the disreputable huckster who emerged victorious from this election is a lying, cheating, sexist, racist, ignorant puss-bag who more properly belongs in prison—well, then, ‘coming together’ would amount to divesting myself of any ethical decency, any humane empathy, and any knowledge of the difference between right and wrong.


I don’t plan to break the law—or even disturb the peace—what would be the point? But don’t ask me to feel like a proud, patriotic American again until after that horrendous mess has been cleaned out of the Executive Mansion in 2020. Not that I expect voters to grow an ounce of brains by then—but the Trumpster-fire is special. We have to cede him that much—the GOP will never find anything as creepy, cold, and slimy as the Donald to run in 2020—such excrescence only comes once in a generation.

I shan’t escape him, however—I have no hope of that. The craven whores who run such things will be rolling out red carpets for this clown, letting his Electoral-college/Russian-meddling technical-win be a huge eraser for every ugly, stupid, dishonest, ignorant thing he’s done or said over this past year’s time. They’ll even pretend his history of real estate chicanery and bankruptcy never really happened either. They’ll give this jerk all the respect and dignified attention that people like Obama, Bush, and Clinton earned—just because he snaked his way, through an election-made-game-show, into the same office.


We’ve never had such a low, small, self-regarding pest get anywhere near the presidency before. An honest media would be harping upon the unique, end-of-an-era, end-of-a-dream aspect of his ‘coup’ over reason. But not these shills—they’ll just go on gassing the audience, pretending that Trump has the respectability one normally associates with a President of the United States.

I can avoid the news shows—and certainly the news channels—but there’s no getting around the late-night monologues and comedy stand-up that attends our every political hiccup nowadays—so I’m still going to have this jackass’s leer on my TV more often than I would wish. With any luck, he’ll be revealed as the laughingstock he is, as promptly as possible—and all the clodhoppers who thought they accomplished something by voting for him can crawl back in their holes.


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